Our Pregnancy Journeys with Donor Sperm
Laura and Lucy knew from the very early stages of their relationship they wanted children and today they have three beautiful boys.
Laura starts by explaining how they went about it:
"Given the fact I'm the oldest and was in my mid-30s, we decided to move forward quickly with starting a family. We agreed that I would go first due to my age but both of us wanted to carry and experience the joys and challenges of pregnancy and birth. Where it became difficult was when I wasn’t successful the first time; my first IVF cycle failed. I then tried IUIs twice – one was unsuccessful, and the other resulted in over-stimulation. I produced six mature eggs, which were too many for a safe, optimal pregnancy. Ideally, only one or two eggs should reach maturity.
I then agreed to give IVF another try. Previously, I had agreed to donate half my eggs (which did not result in a baby), but this time, I wanted to focus solely on myself. I followed the advice and changed my medication and my diet, hoping for a better outcome. This time, I ended up with three quality embryos. I requested that two be transferred, hoping for success given my past difficulties. Although they were initially hesitant, the doctors agreed.
At seven weeks, a scan confirmed one healthy embryo with a heartbeat. We got married and went on our honeymoon, where I experienced some bleeding after a long walk. We decided to enjoy the rest of our honeymoon and wait until we returned home to check on the baby. Upon our return, we went to QA in Portsmouth. Prepared for the worst, we were shocked but overjoyed to see TWO healthy babies during the scan at 13 weeks.
Our twins, Jude and Linus, were born on different days. Jude was born vaginally, late on June 11th, and Linus was delivered quickly via C-section the next day. They are non-identical and have their own distinct personalities.
We chose our sperm donor through Complete Fertility, after thorough research. The donor’s biography resonated with us, and his interests aligned with ours. He expressed interest in having contact with the child at 18, which felt right to us.
We believe in being open with our children about their conception. Saturdays are “Our Story Day,” where we read books like "Zak’s Safari" and stories from the Donor Conception Network. We’ve also created personalised books for each child, telling them their unique story. We talk about their donor conception regularly, ensuring it’s a natural part of their lives and encouraging them to ask questions whenever they want.
Our journey has been filled with challenges and joys, and through it all, we have felt supported and well-treated by our team at Complete Fertility. We are grateful for our beautiful family and the experiences that have shaped us.
Lucy explains her journey:
Laura and I always knew that we wanted to start a family and, ideally, that we both would carry. Shortly after the birth of our twins, I booked in with Complete Fertility for egg reserve tests to get an understanding of how much time was on my side. Reassured, we booked a slot to begin our IVF journey again just over a year later.
We also began the process of moving house around this time and, unfortunately, this did not progress smoothly; after 15 months of collapsed chains and other issues, we decided to delay my IVF treatment for another year to ensure that we did not have to deal with treatment alongside the stress of moving house!
Just a few months after finally moving house, the Covid pandemic struck, causing massive disruption to fertility treatments; however, shortly after clinics were reopened, under strict conditions, I received a call from Complete asking if I’d like to bring my treatment forward. I had used the lockdown to work on my physical health and felt in good shape to begin, starting treatment in July 2020. Fortunately, we had opted to have our summer holiday in Dorset that year, which proved fortuitous as I was in the middle of my treatment by this point and had to travel back for two appointments. Undergoing IVF during the pandemic was a very different experience to Laura’s treatments. Covid regulations meant I had to attend all my appointments unaccompanied, which I think was harder for Laura than it was for me.
My IVF cycle went perfectly, and after three embryos made it to the day 5 stage, I had my transfer, which resulted in the birth of our third son, St. John. All our sons have the same donor, and so are genetic half-siblings.
